Damien Hirst

The present work has been donated to Comic Relief by journalist A.A Gill who lived with the painting hanging above his desk for many years. “I got on with Stalin, ” Gill explained, “because whenever I arrived at a bit of a block or boredom I glanced up and saw him with his benign, twinkly, trust me-I’m-a-paranoid-genocidal-despotic-thug-with-a-moustache-that-could-get-you-a-good-time-in-any-number-of-70s-saunas look, and it was like a rap on the knuckles in case I forgot the real bottom line, and why I wrote…. But all good things and bad men must come to an end. I moved, and the girl who moved with me forced a little palace coup. There was, she said, room for only one infallible demagogue in this relationship.”

Reluctantly, Gill took his ‘Uncle Joe’ along to be valued by a reputable St. James’ auction house where he was politely informed that it was company policy not to sell any Stalin or Hitler memorabilia.
“But you would sell Mao if he was done by Andy Warhol?” he challenged.
“No. Yes. Well that’s a very good point, sir.”
This got Gill thinking and after making a few phone calls, he got back in touch with the auction house expert.
“Look, you know Stalin?” he probed. “You know you won’t sell him because he’s him. Well, what if Damien Hirst painted his nose red and then signed it?”
“Will he?” they questioned.
“He’d be delighted,” Gill replied.
“I’ll get back to you,” the expert said.
Several minutes later Gill got the call he’d been waiting for saying “We’d be very happy to sell your Damien Hirst.”
“My Stalin?”
“Yes. It will need to go into a better sale,” they explained. "And of course we'll have to revise the estimate."

(All quotes taken from A.A. Gill, ‘What Christie’s Won’t Sell’ in Vanity Fair, December 2006, pp. 224-226)