Tupac Shakur

Courtesy the recipient

“I WANT 2 KNOW THAT U KNOW U CAN DEPEND ON ME. IF NO ONE ELSE IS THERE 4 U I AM THERE 4 U.”

17-YEAR-OLD TUPAC SHAKUR PENS A HEARTFELT APOLOGY AND EXPLANATION

Dated only a single day after the letter offered in lot 77, authored after a dancefloor disagreement between Tupac and Cosima at a Talampais High party—this one-page letter resolves final points of contention as the schoolmates edge towards true friendship. “The only reason I wrote that letter like that was because I needed 2 know how u felt,” Tupac kicks off, continuing, “I defend u whether we r friend r [sic] not.” Slightly defensive, Tupac is clearly responding to a response— Cosima must have already answered despite Tupac composing the present letter not even a full 24 hours later. Mere weeks into their acquaintanceship, the speed at which the pair are crafting communications only stresses the urgency of feeling that already existed between them. Tupac’s tone softens with his next words, “U said u have grown 2 care 4 me, well I needed to know that,” revealing the adolescent insecurity hiding behind his indignation and bravado. His confession proceeds, “I didn’t want u 2 think I was just another boy trying 2 take advantage of u. I really care 4 u. I haven’t gone a day without thinking about whether u r okay or not.” Tupac craves recognition of the complexity of his character, needing Cosima to acknowledge the heightened emotional sensitivity he’s cultivated in opposition to his peers. Tupac asserts that the only way forward is through friendship—a friendship, he affirms, that will be a safe place to land. “I want 2 be there 4 u... I want 2 know u know u can depend on me. If no one else is there 4 u I am there 4 u. I really mean it.” Closing the letter, he presses the point, “Please realize I really CARE 4 U! If ever u doubt it read it over.”

In the summer of 1988, 17-year-old Tupac Shakur and family moved from Baltimore to Marin City, California. There, Tupac attended Tamalpais High School in nearby Mill Valley, where he poured his creative energies into the award-winning, student-run Ensemble Theatre Company, and perhaps most importantly, The Microphone Sessions, a poetry workshop run by Leila Steinberg. Steinberg quickly recognized the future superstar's talent, and took him under her wing, mentoring his progress as a writer, and even welcoming Tupac into her family's home for a time. Their relationship would prove to be pivotal for Tupac's career—not only did Steinberg help Tupac hone his writing skills, but she would also become his first manager, organizing a concert for his rap group Strictly Dope, with whom Tupac recorded under the stage name MC New York. Steinberg helped broker Tupac's signing with Atron Gregory, manager of Digital Underground, and in 1990, Tupac joined the group as a roadie and back-up dancer, before going on to debut with them in 1991, under the stage name 2Pac. The rest is history.

Cosima, the recipient of the present letter, was a Sophomore and fellow member of the Ensemble Theatre Company at Tamalpais High. The pair shared a profound connection at this time, just before and in the beginning stages of Tupac's rise to fame, from their first meeting on Cosima's birthday in October 1988, and lasting for approximately 7-8 months. This, and the other letters offered (see lots 71-72 and 74-76) reveal a tender-hearted, fiercely passionate young man, dedicated to clear communication who loved people deeply, and expressed emotions without fear. Tupac’s ability to love so deeply, and to plainly express this love continues to explain the indelible mark he left on the hearts of those who knew him and devotees around the globe. These letters capture Tupac at a seminal juncture—an adolescent on the edge of true maturity, a natural wordsmith evolving into a lyricist and poet.